The Cat Album
Kitty Hairball
Well let me tell you how it started out
I was just havin’ fun
And she would hang around when I was there
I guess she started thinkin’
That she liked me and I liked her too
And then I let her come inside
Before I knew it there was no headin’ back
From her feline charms I could not hide
Now she’s my kitty I call her Kitty
After Matt Dillion’s famous Gunsmoke girlfriend
She’s my kitty surname of Hairball
She could be in the movies
'Cause she’s so pretty
She clawed a hole in my window screen
So she could come and go as she pleases
I had to buy her some hairball medicine
Because of the awful way she gags and sneezes
Sometimes I wonder if I can really love her
And is she mine for all her life
Sometimes it seems like I’m somehow married
Though I don’t even have a wife
Chorus
She’s a great kitty
she comes to me when she’s called
She’s a great kitty
she follows me around like a dog
She’s my Kitty cat Hairball
by Doug Newman
© 2001 Sandthistle Music / ASCAP
Kittens for Free
Kittens for free
I’ve got kittens for free
One might be the best friend you’ll ever know
You can name ‘em for a race home
Win place or show
Kittens for free
I’ve got kittens for free
Tell the truth I hate to let them go
But I can see
They’ve gonna be great company for someone
Like their Mother’s been for me
Me myself I’ve named them all
With a cowboy theme
One is Rusty his brother’s Dusty
There’s Clementine and Pokie
Kittens for free
I’ve got kittens for free
One might be your best friend you’ll never know
Unless you take a chance
And give ‘em a home
Kittens for free
I’ve got kittens for free
by Doug Newman
© 2001 Sandthistle Music / ASCAP
Kitty Come Back
Kitty come back I didn’t mean it
Kitty come back I was only foolin’
When I said I wished you were a dog
Don’t hit the open road
Don’t leave me all alone
It’s dangerous out there
There’s fire ants and killer bees everywhere
And there’s wild dogs that just might eat you
And people that’ll catch you and stuff you
And try and sell you in a store
So Kitty come back I didn’t mean it
Kitty come back I was only foolin’
When I said I wished you were a dog
Don’t hit the open road
Don’t leave me all alone
Kitty come back
Kitty come back
by Doug Newman
© 2001 Sandthistle Music / ASCAP
I’m Not a Cat Person
I’m not a cat person
I’m not a cat person
I’m not a cat person
I’m not a cat person
Just because I love my Kitty
What is a cat person anyway
Well I can’t say
All I know is that I love my kitty
And I’m glad she wants to stay
I’m not a cat person
I’m not a cat person
I’m not a cat person
I’m not a cat person
Just because I love my kitty cat
by Doug Newman
© 2001 Sandthistle Music / ASCAP
Le Essance de Kitay Letare
If you decide to in kittens imbibe
With more than two at one time
And keep them inside where they can hide
From all bad things outside
(French Subtitles)
Beware beware the kitay letare
It’s essence can bite in the eyes
Beware beware the kitay letare
The essance of which all despise
And de sonce lauraine
Par le vou es de maine
Par le vou es le peppe le peau
Le peppe es meau
Par le vou le peau
Es le peppe le peppe le peau
En le peppe le peau was en par le vou
En le sounce de le rain en le Spainia
Vere mainly ze rain of Spain
Fell on ze peppe's main
Vey la peppe le peppe le peau
Beware beware de kitay letare
It’s essance can bite in the eyes
Beware beware the kitay letare
The essance of which all despise
Beware de kitay letare
by Doug Newman
© 2001 Sandthistle Music / ASCAP
Philosophical Cat
I had a talk with my cat the other day
She had some questions of hers
that she had to say
Were giving her some angst and a tummy ache
She scratched behind her ears
and began to contemplate
Why God made kitties
And he gave them hairballs
And why God made kitties
And he gave them ear mites
I said well Kitty there’s something
you should understand
This world has never been fair for cats or man
Just be thankful for the life that you have
Your cat food and toys
and you don’t have to ask
Why God made kitties
And he gave them hairballs
And why God made kitties
And he gave them ear mites
I’m just thankful that God made kitties
Even though he gave them ear mites
by Doug Newman
© 2001 Sandthistle Music / ASCAP
Free Kitty
Run wild run free Kitty I won’t hold you down
You’re a child of the wild wind that’s blowin’ through
this town
And I won’t ask you to be some cat that stays all day
indoors
And never goes mousing in the great outdoors
You’re a free kitty runnin’ wild and free
You’re a kitty that’s free to roam as you please
You’re a free kitty runnin’ wild and free
I’m just glad that you’re lazy enough to come back to me
Free Kitty hmmm
Free Kitty hmmm
Free Kitty hmmm
Free Kitty hmmm
You’ll never be happy with a kitty litter box
You need to go outside where the breeze blows a lot
To fertilize the ground like cats have always done
To grow the trees and flowers in the fields where you run
You’re a free kitty runnin’ wild and free
You’re a kitty that’s free to roam as you please
You’re a free kitty runnin’ wild and free
I’m just glad that you’re lazy enough to come back to me
Free Kitty hmmm
Free Kitty hmmm
Free Kitty hmmm
Free Kitty hmmm
by Doug Newman
© Sandthistle Music / ASCAP
My Kitty Likes to Eat Green Peas
My kitty likes to eat green peas
My kitty likes to eat green peas
My kitty likes to eat green peas
And she likes canned corn
My kitty likes to eat green peas
My kitty likes to eat green peas
My kitty likes to eat green peas
And she likes canned corn
I don’t know whether she’d like corn on the cob or not
Or some fresh snap peas
Or lima beans a lot
But my kitty likes to eat green peas
My kitty likes to eat green peas
My kitty likes to eat green peas
And she likes canned corn
And she likes canned corn
by Doug Newman
© 2001 Sandthistle Music / ASCAP
Tomcat
Kitty cat had her kittens today
One is black and one is gray
Two are yellow tabbies with some calico
She had them all outside today
Where it was I couldn’t say
But I heard her hissin’
When theTomcat found out where
And she said Tomcat Tomcat go away
Your not gonna eat my kittens today
I’ll fight you to the death if I
Have to scratch out both of your eyes
Tomcat
Now Tomcat said oh my dear
There’s no need for you to fear
Why I just came by to wish you hello
But don’t you think oh my dear
With all these kittens runnin’ ‘round here
They’ll eat up all the mice and leave us none
And she said Tomcat Tomcat go away
I don’t care what you say
Tomcat Tocat don’t think I
Will fall for all you old Tomcat lies
Tomcat Tomcat go away
Tomcat Tomcat go away
by Doug Newman
© 2001 Sandthistle Music / ASCAP
Say Goodbye to Your Brother
Say goodbye to your brother
He’s goin’ to a new home
Say goodbye to your brother
He’s goin’ out on his own
I hope that they love him
The way that we do
And he will love them too
I hope he grows up to be a great cat
And mouser if needed to
Say goodbye to your brother
He’s goin’ to a new home
by Doug Newman
© 2001 Sandthistle Music / ASCAP
Computer Chip Kitty
You’re my computer chip kitty
I’ll know where you are
When you get lost and they take you to the
pound
They’ll scan you and find out you’re mine
“Cause you’re my computer chip kitty
I’ll find out where you are
When you get lost and they take you to the
pound
They’ll scan you and know that you’re mine
by Doug Newman
© 2001 Sandthistle Music / ASCAP
Welcome Home Kitty
Welcome home kitty it’s good to have you back
Welcome home where you belong
Welcome home kitty it’s good to have you back
Welcome home where you belong
I’m glad that fire ants didn’t bite you
I’m glad that killer bees didn’t sting you
I’m glad that wild dogs didn’t eat you
And nobody caught you and stuffed you
And tried to sell you in a store
Welcome home kitty it’s good to have you back
Welcome home where you belong
Welcome home kitty it’s good to have you back
Welcome home where you belong
Welcome home where you belong
by Doug Newman
© 2001 Sandthistle Muic / ASCAP
Frisky Kitty
Frisky frisky kitty
Why are you so frisky
Frisky frisky kitty
Why are you so frisky
Why are you destroying
Everything in sight
Could it be you have a problem with ear mites
Do you have a problem I should know about
Should I take you to the vet and have him check you out
Frisky frisky kitty
Why are you so frisky
Frisky frisky kitty
Why are yo so frisky
Why do you look at me in your strange and cunning way
As if to say you know you’ll get me when I hit the hay
Could it be you’re plotting to somehow do me in
Because I didn’t put your favorite cat food in your tin
Frisky frisky kitty
Why are you so frisky
Frisky frisky kitty
Why are you so frisky
You know I saw a class that maybe I could take
Where I’d learn to read your mind
But it’s probably fake
Frisky frisky kitty
Why are you so frisky
Frisky Frisky kitty
Why are you so frisky
by Doug Newman
© 2001 Sandthistle Music / ASCAP
The Hobo and the Kitty Cat
We rambled around from town to town
Jumping up and off of freight trains
We were just hoboin' around
And if I had to say just who was to blaim
I guess it'd be me for givin' her some kitty food
When she was hungry in a desparate way
What kind of man gives his kitty fleas
I guess that'd be a hobo like me
I don't deserve the love of my kitty
But I'm glad my kitty loves me
We hopped a freight to Frisco
To mine the dot com rush
Only to find those dot coms
Had all gone bust
And we stood in soup lines
With former millionaires
The funny thing was they all had long and stringy hair
Chorus
Please kitty don't leave me
Just because I gave you fleas
When I sell a few more bottles and cans
I'll buy us some flea spray and they'll be on the lam
We hoped a freight to Denver
To breath the mountain air
And we had a campfire
And had a little rum
And before you know it my kitty was a yoddlin' son of a gun
Chorus
Yodle eh ee ooo
Yodle eh ee ooo
Yodle eh ee ooo
by Doug Newman
(c) 20001 Sandthistle Music / ASCAP
(c) Doug Newman
